Working Out

A Struggle and A Win….

/ Varza / 1 Comment

The past two to three weeks have been a struggle for me in working out lately. My knees were crapping out on me, my wrist was to the point where I could put no pressure on it and I was burning out from going to the gym. In truth, I wanted to increase my cardio but I just couldn’t push myself any further. I tried doing a kickboxing class at the gym and ended up not being able to workout for almost a week. Worked out one day and then bam, down and out for another couple of days.

And I was burning out because the pounds weren’t disappearing like they should have. I was still only loosing an average of a pound a week. Which was pissing me off. I wanted to swim. I needed to swim. I needed to feel the cool water wrapped around my body as I glided thru it. And finally! I finally fit back into a swim suit that I had on hand. So, I broke down spent the $3 bucks to go to the local pool and within the past couple of weeks I have lost almost 10lbs. 10lbs! In just over two weeks! It is insane I know but in truth, my body feels sleeker and more lean and damned sexy!

Yes, I said sexy. I actually like looking in the mirror. I forgot how much swimming inpacted how I felt. Even going to the gym and dieting hasn’t made me feel this way in over several months. So, I take that as a win. A very big win… for me since for so long I have hated my body and felt disgusting. Definatly not sexy and beautiful.

 I look forward to going to the pool and even the gym now. In which, this week I meet with another new trainer. l’sigh… yep another one.

But its time to go and tomorrow is another day at the pool.

Gone Baby Gone…

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I was sure if I should post this or even talk about it but I am slightly frustrated. I had this event happen to me once in the past with Jenny Craig. You get your counselor, you build a relationship with them and then she disappeared. I mean got a promotion and left without even letting her clients know. It was frustrating to the extreme because I spent over 2 months getting this women to understand my limitations with finances and food allergies. But once she was gone it wasn’t so much that she just left but from there one oout for the next month, each week I was bounced from counselor to conselor. Never seeing the same person more then once and spending half my time there going over again and again what my limitations were.

So, to my utter frustration I have had a problem with my personal trainer these past few weeks. He didn’t show up for our session two Mondays ago and then didn’t show up again this past week. Luckily they had another trainer I could work with the first time but this past Monday I had to reschedule. Frustrating since I had spent 30 minutes in traffic on my day off to get there to and from the gym. But whatever, the guy was booked solid and no one else was avaible. On Tuesday when I met with the new guy, R, he told me that my last trainer was gone. Without a bye your leave.

Is it wrong of me to be frustrated? I mean these are people who are suppose to help be a support system in our weight loss/training journey and it doesn’t seem that they even see their clients as real people. How could you spend so much time with someone and then just leave them hanging? It pisses me off and I have been trying to gt past my self-doubt and my desire to see this as a sign, once again, that I shouldn’t be loosing weight. That I am meant to be a fat ass for the rest of my life? Or I should just learn, that like with some friends, they just leave you.

Bring On The Pain?

/ Varza / 1 Comment

I met with a personal trainer last night for the first time, actually no it was the second time but the first was my orientation and PT sign up. Now, when I first met up with him and he showed me what we would be doing I though, ‘okay this will be easy. A few jumping jacks, squat jumps, crunches, etc Not a problem!’ Boy was I wrong! I can say I definatly got my moneys worth. Today my lefts are sore and hurt and my arms are lagging behind me and I am 5 hours into my day and I STILL want to go to sleep. But alas I can’t. Sadly, last night I was feeling great! I was chattery, happy and just estatic. I pushed myself and awhile I wasn’t a 100% perfect I would score about a 85 – 90%. I didn’t let myself give into the pain when I wanted to stop I kept going. I am happy about that.

Now, he did tell me to take today off but after I explained that I can’t because I didn’t workout much over the weekend, I am heading back in. But next week, like hell I am. I am going to workout a few days ahead of time and take Wednesday off. But part of me is wishing that I could meet with him more then once a week or for at least an hour. But I can’t afford it. Hell, I can barely afford 30 minutes a week, I took a ton of money out of my entertainment budget and shopping budget to be able to do this. But after last night, I am not sorry I did. He pushed me beyond my comfortablity and made me work really really hard. Which I do do from time to time when I work out but not like last night. I was sweaty and breathing hard but I did it anyways. It felt good.

I am meeting up with him for a bit tonight so he can show me some excercises to do when I am not meeting with him. I look forward to it. He is a pretty cool guy. I just hope this keeps up. I am happy.

You Icky Ugly Wall…

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I cam across my first wall today. Its all icky slimy and wet. I do not like it. Go away wall cause I don’t want to touch you. Anyone have any bleach I can clean it with so I can then break thru it? Stupid workout walls – my mind hates you.